Wednesday, September 9, 2015

a different kind of work in progress

If you know me much,
you know that I struggle with my weight.

As in,
me and my fat
a lot.

And for the past 14 months,
despite my best efforts,
the fat has been winning.

And frankly,
I am quite sick of it.

I decided that from our anniversary (Aug 8th)
to my birthday (Sept 30th)
sugar, in any form except the occasional bite of fruit
and wheat
would not pass my lips.
At all.

It's not like I ate much of either,
but I did allow it to sneak in here and there
in the form of an occasional 1/2 of one of those skinny sandwich buns
or a low carb tortilla.
A 1/2 cup of ice cream
or maybe an oreo or two.
A buttered cracker.
A half of a protein bar.
Some peanut butter m&ms, warmed to perfection...

I am happy to report that except for communion crackers on Sundays
(I pick the very smallest piece on the tray)
and a very tiny bite of Tyler's burger once, 
after he kept insisting it was the very best burger he'd ever eaten in his life
I have ingested no wheat.

And sugar?
the same.
Except twice, accidentally.
I ordered a Southwest Salad from McDonald's.
It wasn't until I'd eaten 1/2 the salad that I thought to check the dressing.
11 grams of sugar!
Darn it!!
I really liked that salad.

And Monday, 
returning from visiting friends in TX,
(where I quietly declined on all sorts of deliciousness)
we stopped to get snacks and I chose beef jerky.
Because what could be wrong with dried beef??
that's what.

It wasn't real beef jerky : /
I had one small piece before checking the label.

Darn it again!
Even with my faux pas,
I am quite pleased with myself.

Being so conscious about what I eat (or don't eat, rather)
has caused me to watch,
more carefully,
everything I put in my mouth.

When I cook,
I am a picker.
But I've found that in the past month,
I've picked a whole lot less than usual.
Sometimes I'll have dinner completely ready and realize I haven't tasted it once!

Do I feel better? 
Has the scale been kind to me?


But I'm pretty darn proud of my willpower anyways.
I almost feel like my sister :-)

I've said "No" to 
warm fresh bread at Longhorn Steakhouse
(sitting on my counter for 3 days.
Three days, People, and not one nibble)
smore's while camping
peanut butter m&ms
banana splits
the last Ritz, taunting me in its crinkly package
Krispy Kreme donuts
and countless generous offers of "Would you like a bite of  'x'?"

I've passed on all these things,
but I haven't felt deprived
and sorry for myself;
I feel "go me!"



  2. That is pretty awesome!! I did an 8 week challenge over the summer with my sisters. We earned points for all kinds of healthy habits like drinking water, exercising, getting in 5 servings of fruit/veg. We could have sugar one day a week. I found that really helped me say no, because I knew that Sunday was coming and I could have my treats then. I really liked it and felt much better. But now that it is over, I'm having a hard time saying no to the bite of this and just one of that, etc. (sigh!) I hope you can keep yours up!

  3. Go You, if that's what you really want in life! That's some pretty darn good will power, which virtue should be its own reward! Living that long without all that sugar must have been worth it just for that self knowledge alone. On the other hand, Personally I am so darn tired of the fight and worrying about every bite that goes into my mouth. It's just too exhausting and guilt ridden. I don't want to live that way. And neither do I want the extra weight. So I've learned to compromise. I pass up a lot of things I don't need because I know I just don't really want or need them and eat the things I do want, hopefully in moderation. And I'm learning to love the new form my body has taken on. Or at least to appreciate and kinda like it. I stay active and am stronger than ever under my soft layers and I'm learning to live with that. All of this has to be good enough because I'm tired of punishing myself about food. I've birhed 7 babies, been in bed rest 3 times in the process, and just plain gotten older. No wonder I don't look 20something anymore! I think all I've been thru is a good trade for my 7 wonders. You are a beautiful woman and I hope you find some measure of peace in this fight. Hugs!


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