A young friend of Tyler’s is getting married this weekend.
His bride-to-be is a sweet little thing from a close-knit family.
She’ll be leaving several younger siblings.
If I were in a position to give Ms. Abigail Sawyer
(isn’t that a lovely name?!)
I would tell her,
“Your siblings will miss you terribly.
your parents will miss you, too; they’ll be fine.
But the kids.
They just might feel abandoned.
they like Taylor.
And they’re excited to have a big brother
but they don’t really know what they’re in for.
When you leave
and don’t come back after a few days
there will be a hole.
I know you are anxious to be one with your new husband
and all that s*x
and cooking and cleaning
will keep you pretty occupied.
May I encourage you, though,
to take the time to let your siblings know
that you still value them
and love them.
Send them a note
with a drawing - if you’re so inclined.
Visit once a month.
Help smooth the edges of that jaggedy hole.
there will be a jaggedy hole; they’ve had you their whole lives.
you are gone.”
Nate, Mandy, ‘Lish, Matt,
I didn’t know.
I never thought about what my leaving the family
might mean to you.
I love you.